The Neurotic Writer and Creative Tax Writing
(The Neurotic Writer is a comic strip for writers.)
Therapist: "Would you mind putting down your notebook
so you can talk?"
Suzie Writer: “Can't. I'm behind on my taxes. I don't know
why people hate them so much; there are so many loopholes."
Therapist: “Oh? Like what?"
Suzie Writer: “I can claim all of my writing expenses.
I wrote about a heroine on a cruise so I could claim my entire trip.
Next year I am going on safari."
Therapist: “You'll probably want to get an accountant to
make sure all of your claims are legit."
Suzie Writer: “Everything is legit as long as I don't get audited
and even then I can cry my way through it."
Therapist: “It might be more difficult than that."
Suzie Writer: “I doubt it. Oh! I can't forget my new
bedroom set. I wrote about it in great detail so I can claim it."
Therapist: “Now that I am sure you can't claim.
At least not the full amount.”
Suzie Writer: “Sure I can. I even started my own charity
so I can donate funds to myself and claim the deduction."
Therapist: “Suzie, you really need professional tax assistance."
Suzie Writer: “Don't worry, Doc. I know what I'm doing."
Therapist: “Just do me one favor. When you're doing time,
don't mention my name to the prison psychiatrist."
Suzie Writer: “Anyone ever tell you its not attractive to
frown so much? You should get some of that anti-aging cream.
I wear it every day.”
Therapist: “Let me guess. You wrote about it so you can claim it on your taxes."