Sunday, January 30, 2011

The Neurotic Writer Turns Positive

The Neurotic Writer Turns Positive

Suzie Writer: "Hi Doc! What a beautiful day!"

Therapist: "If you like hail storms."

Suzie Writer: "I love everything about life!"

Therapist: "Is your new book about a peppy cheerleader? Is that why you've suddenly turned happy."

Suzie Writer: "No. Although that is a good idea. I can call it The Cheerleader and the Pirate. But I digress. I just found an old book called The Power of Positive Thinking. It has changed my life. I don't think I'll be needing therapy any longer."

Therapist: "Really? Are you sure you don't want to continue your sessions just in case?"

Suzie Writer: "I'm positive I won't be needing them. I am positive I am fixed. I am positive my life is awesome!"

Therapist: (Doubtful) "And that includes your love life? How has that been lately?"

Suzie Writer: "Absolutely wonderful! I know the perfect man is on his way."

Therapist: "Good. How is your agent hunt going?"

Suzie Writer: (Jaw twitches) : "Wonderful! I know that one of the 250 agents I have queried will fall in love with my books and sell all of them."

Therapist: "Good. How is your sister? You know, the one you claim your parents love more than you?"

Suzie Writer: (blinks hard) "Just great! She got a new job paying twice her former salary, her husband took her to the Bahamas for their anniversary, and her oldest child was tested into the gifted program at school at age five."

Therapist: "And how is your mother?"

Suzie Writer: (Jumps up from the couch) "Okay, my life sucks! I need therapy. Double my sessions for this week."

Therapist: "If you're positive that is what you want."


Kim Watters said...

Suzie, Suzie, Suzie, what are we going to do with you? :)

Tina LaVon said...

I know.
She is just a mess. :)