In this episode of The Neurotic Writer, Suzie takes her writing too seriously.
Suzie Writer: “Happy new year, doc!”
Therapist: “There you are! I was getting worried.
You missed your last three
sessions and you haven’t returned
any of my phone calls.”
Suzie Writer: (Plops in chair.
Big smile on her face.)
“Sorry, doc. I was under arrest. I think.”
Suzie Writer: “My next book is about a female
CIA agent named Sally Saltless.
Angelina Jolie will play her when
I sell the script.”
Therapist: “Let me guess.
You flew to D.C. and tried to pick
up a CIA agent
on his way out of headquarters.”
Suzie Writer: “Close. I marched up to the
security guard at the door and
asked if I could shadow an agent for a day.
They escorted me to a tiny room
and asked me a trillion questions.
I do believe they think I’m working with that
guy whose wikki is leaking.”
Suzie Writer: “Yeah. That’s it. Well, they didn’t
believe I wasn’t a spy, so they
called the local Sheriff’s office. By the way,
I’m still waiting for him to send me my pink
underwear. (She drums her fingers on her knee.)
My buddy, the sheriff, explained
that I am a writer and I take my research seriously.
Okay, that’s not exactly what he said.”
Therapist: “I can imagine. Does he still have a
restraining order out on you?”
Suzie Writer: “Nope. It expired.”
Therapist: “What happened with the CIA?”
Suzie Writer: “They said I could see the cafeteria
if I promised to shut up, go home and
never come back. How rude!”
Therapist: “Yeah... So, is that end
of your book?”
Suzie Writer: (giggles) “You know me better
than that. Is the movie RED on DVD yet?
The actors broke into CIA headquarters.
It’s sort of a ‘how to’ video.”
Therapist: (Shakes her head.)
“Let’s make up those sessions you missed
before the end of the week.”
(All characters are the creation of Tina LaVon and are just for fun.)